To My Kyla Bella On Your 4th Birthday

Oh my word Kyla Bells!  You are 4 today!

It’s finally happened after month of counting down the days, it’s finally here and you are finally 4!!  Last night before you went to sleep you held up you pinky finger and said, “One last sleep – I so excite that only one more sleep!”

Being 3 was a challenging year for you in so many ways.  I’ve watched you grow into an even more incredibly loving sister when your little brother arrived, I’ve watched you face going to school and be in a class on your own, I’ve watched you experience the difficulties of settling into school and making friends, I’ve watched you become aware of your surroundings and so much more understanding of how everything works.  Just the other day we went to fill up the car at the petrol station and you started asking me where I got money from to pay for the petrol and how the money went onto the card that I used.  So many things that I never expected you to even think about.

Not only have you started to understand they way things work in the “big world” but you have also started to understand feelings and how other peoples actions affect our feelings.  Just last night I went with you to the toilet during our (often intense) bedtime routine and Riya was screaming for me because I left the room, you told me to leave you and go and sit next to Riya because she loves me and she wants me to be with her.  I can’t tell you how proud of you I was, that you would sacrifice me helping you so that your sister could be happy.  That is just one example of how you are able to put yourself aside to look after your brother and sister.

You have always been a very artistic baby but now you can express this in real ways, you can take pictures better than many adults I know, draw pictures that really look like what you wanted it to and I just love getting those glimpses into how you think and what you find important.

Everyday I look at you and marvel at how you are turning into a real little girl now.  No more traces of the chubby babyness or awkward lack of abilities that defines those toddler years.  I miss those little baby arms wrapped around mine, I miss your old bedtime routine of holding my hand and pressing each one of my fingers (in order) before holding my thumb and falling asleep, I miss those hours and hours that I got to cuddle you as I tried to get you to go to sleep and as you tried desperately to stay awake, I miss dressing you up in the tiny little outfits that you had and I just miss all of those precious little moments that we had together, that have gone too soon.

BUT I love that you are still you.  Just the older, taller and more outspoken version.  I love that we can have chats about your day as you try desperately to not fall asleep (yip, you’re still doing that), I love that you are no longer the fussy eater that you used to be – now you eat pretty much anything put in front of you (and lots of it), I love that every day that I get to spend with you I get to know you a little bit more, to find out a new thing to love just a bit more about you.

We’ve had our up’s and down’s this year though, you and I…  You’ve had a hectic year of change and growth and finding your own special place in our family, which has resulted in us butting heads a few too many times.  You love to challenge the rules and question them.  Often leaving me flabbergasted at your reasoning behind the naughty little things that you do.  But we’re getting there.

My darling girl, you are so precious to me.  So very precious.

The last 4 years have been the best years of my life.  The most challenging years, but still the very best years of my life so far.  Being your Mommy has taught me so much and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life watching you continue to grow into the adult that you will become.

I love you so much now and forever!

xoxo