Emotionally Spent

The other night we were getting into bed and Seth casually asked, “Are you pregnant?”

Now, normally under these circumstances a variety of thoughts will most likely pop into your head:

1. Maybe eating all those Nik Naks before bed was a bad idea – food baby deluxe.
2. Excuse me?  Who are you calling fat?!
3. Is that a hint of hopefulness in his voice there?
4. That’s not the best way to start “business time” you know!
5. Maybe I am pregnant.  Sherbs.  Maybe I’m pregnant.  Oh gosh.  There’s a baby in my tummy.  That’s incredible.  That would explain why I wanted to eat all those Nik Naks.  How would he know this before me.  Oh man a baby.  Another baby.  How is this even possible?  We’re so careful.  Well mostly.  Oh no wait.  I just had my monthly, this is kind of impossible.  Maybe I’m on a candid camera version of “I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant” which would be kind of embarrassing considering that I’ve washed my make up off.  No.  I’m pretty sure I’m not pregnant.
6. OK, it must be because I’m getting fat and he has a death wish.

But instead of saying any of those things out loud, I cautiously ask, “I don’t think so – but why do you ask?”

And in return he cautiously replies that he’s noticed that I’ve been a “bit emotional lately”.

A LITTLE BIT EMOTIONAL?!  Are you freaking kidding me?

Although to be fair just a couple of minutes before this I had dissolved into a pool of tears brought on by absolutely nothing.  Nothing at all.  And let’s not even bring up how much I cried when Charlotte died in Charlottes Web – the kids were like “Mom’s eyes are leaking guys – it’s time to get outta here before she attacks us with all those annoying hugs and kisses”  “Yeah it’s super gross when she all wet with tears and snotty nosed”  “RUN!”.

I’ve gotta say, I feel like I have been on a emotional roller coaster for the last couple of weeks and I’m spent.  Totally done.  With my emotions and my thoughts.  Which is kind of unusual for me.  So while he might have been risking his life, he did have a valid point.

But the thing is that I don’t have an answer.  I have no cooking clue why the heck I’m giddy with happiness one minute, then bawling my eyes out because we didn’t “celebrate” our anniversary properly, then restraining myself from freaking out at the dogs who have been all up in my face all the bloody time to laughing like a nut watching The Other Woman.  I get that womans hormones are crazy but like, enough now.

We’re going away for a couple of nights next week (without the kids) so I’m hoping that this will be my chance to regroup and chill out for a bit.  Here’s hoping!

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