Oh hello there Kyla.
It’s your birthday today so I thought that I’d take a moment to sit and jot down some thoughts that I’ve had since my last to you letter on your sixth birthday. Oh by the way, you’ll read these right? So that I’m not just writing to strangers on the internet. Okay? Great. Thanks
I know we spoke about it before, but have you given anymore thought on just turning 6 again? You see, as I tried to explain to you, your Daddy and I just aren’t quite ready for you to be 7 yet. 7 is just so, well, it’s just so OLD. Not old like bordering on frail care, but old as in sometimes I hear you talking and I wonder where the teenager came from. So don’t you think it will be fun to be 6 again? No? Really? Are you sure? Like sure, sure? OK, I guess it won’t, but I had to try.
But hold up – before we head into 7, let’s reflect on what 6 was like shall we?
Do you remember saying goodbye to your first school and starting big school all on your own? I was so worried about you and how you would handle it, but I shouldn’t have been. Although you were a bit nervous, you totally nailed it. Now you have a bunch of very sweet friends and your second term report literally blew me away (despite how often we argue about homework).
Speaking of arguing, have you taken a course in this recently? I’m guessing that it must have been an early birthday present from the birthday fairy? Or have they started debating at your school because, sherbit, you have an answer for everything. Which would really be annoying, except that sometimes you’re actually right! I must say that I am really enjoying the chats that we are having now, it’s really nice that you actually tell me about your day in detail (as opposed to just saying “It was fine” all the time). However we need to work on the timing, I’d prefer if you could tell me these things during the day over a cup of tea, instead of when you should be going to sleep. You know what I’m talking about.
It’s been so great getting to know you. Like the real you and not my own version of you. Does that make sense? I’m talking about the you that eats all her vegetables first so that she can enjoy the best parts at the end. The you that adores a good homemade meal and frequently requests chops or curry for supper. The you that can draw better than I can. The you that is shy, but still enthusiastic about learning new languages. The you that despite provoking your siblings regularly, still loves them fiercely. The you that adores pink, tucks her shirt into her skirt and pulls her socks over her pants. That you. She’s great.
I know you’re excited about turning 7 and despite not really feeling ready to be the Mom of a 7 year old, I’m excited for you too. But on days like these I can’t help thinking back to the very first time you were placed in my arms. You see, the thing is, before you, I was just me. Nothing special. But you, YOU my dear sweet girl, YOU made me a mother. It’s one of the most defining moments of my life and I am so grateful to God that He gave me you to love and cherish.
My girl, I adore you. Every bit of you. And I pray that as we continue into this journey as mother and daughter, our relationship will keep growing. I long to be there for you to confide in when your best friend is being nasty or when you start fancying boys (which only happens when you’re like, uh, 25 or something). I want to be there to guide you when you are confused about what to do. To teach you, to love you, to nurture you.
Oh, I almost forgot. Because things are getting all emotional up in here, I need you to know that I also want be there to annoy you, embarrass you accidentally (and on purpose), laugh with you, be silly with you and discipline you when you need it. Just in case you thought you’d get away without any of that.
We both know that I may fail on many occasions in the future, but I need you know that no matter what happens, I flipping love you. NO MATTER WHAT.
Now, let’s celebrate baby!!