The other night I was snuggling with my only boy child and waiting for him to peacefully pass out after a long day. He cuddled into me before slowly, but surely falling asleep.
Well, that was my intention anyway.
The reality was far more like me asking him numerous times to just calm the flip down. He was up and down, demanding a book and a song and then the next second playing with yet another toy he’d hidden under his pillow.
He asked for something. I said no. He asked again. I said NO. He asked about 342 more times but I was unwaivering. The answer was NO. He didn’t seem to like that though because after that last no, he shouted right in my ear.
So I whacked him (very softly) on the leg out of shock for my now damaged ear.
He bursts into screaming tears. He cries for about 2 solid minutes before looking at me and saying, ” You da yudest Mommy in da whole World. I’m goingta tell Ga about you! You even yuder dan Daddy! Actually, you are da yudest person in da whole family!”
(yude means rude, just FYI)
Then he keeps muttering angry words at me before suddenly falling silent. After about 5 minutes he looks at me and says, “I sorwy Mommy! I sorwy dat I showted in your ear.” And then we did cuddle it out and he did fall asleep snuggled next to me like I had originally pictured.
And then I thought it was over.
But then yesterday morning I had the flipping audacity to give him a Barbie yoghurt instead of a Spiderman one. I know right?! What the hell is wrong with me?! What the flip was I thinking?!
I insisted that he eat it though, because I had already opened it. To which he started his whole “yude Mommy” tirade. It culminated in, “Mommy if you are yude to me gen, den I am going to leave dis house. I going to leave for TEN YEARS! I won’t come back.”
Sigh.
But it doesn’t end there. I have been sharing a few other moments on Twitter and Instagram over the last few months. Here’s a few that others:
Ga mentioned to him that she had a sore back and legs. He looks at her and says, “Dats what happens when you get old Ga!”
Randomly sitting cuddling my son.
Knox: “Mom, your boobies are fat but not your tummy.”
Never a dull moment with this kid.
— Cindy Alfino (@CindyAlfino) February 17, 2017
“Mom, if you don’t let me have dis ting den tomorrow when I have to draw my family at tool, den I’m gonna make you a circle!” #parenting
— Cindy Alfino (@CindyAlfino) February 15, 2017
10 comments
That is too funny. My Liam James was that boy. ? Always a chirp! Can’t believe he will be 21 next month!!
Jeepers, time flies! I can’t even begin to think of Knox at 21.
Aaah this melted my heart and gave me a good giggle. Really awesome to record these memories! And no body wants to be a circle. Teehee!
Yay! So glad you enjoyed it! I know right – anything but a circle 😉
I had my 9 year old shout at me yesterday, “I quit this family!” I then said calmly, “fine-then leave”.
She stomps out and I continue with what I’m doing (inside I’m dying and hoping she doesn’t hop the wall) 5mins later I peek out to see if she’s still around and she up in a tree (phew)
After a good talk through her feelings and the reason for the outburst-all is well.
Later she explains that she was planning her “life strategy” up in the tree ? It was hilarious!
#parenting #NEVERadullmoment #lovethemtobits
HAHAHA that’s brilliant!! I’d love to know what her life strategy is at 9!
When James was at pre school and we had a visit from his teacher – he proudly showed her around the whole house with a special stop at our cupboard where we had some dusty bottles of sherry trifle and said ‘and this is where my pawents keep all their liquor.’ ( same school as Knox!) We love Knox’s antics around here.
LOL!! That’s so funny!!! How to rat out your parents!
I have to laugh about this. It’s amazing how specific he is especially about leaving the house for ten years. HECTIC!
He sounds like such a cutie pie
I know right! And then he told me that if I am going to be nice again, then I can call him and he will think about coming back 😉